Love and Chicken

My cat is the best torment I could ever be blessed or cursed with. Holy hell.

I was walking home in the freezing (33*) night writing poetry in my head and listening to James Taylor in my headphones as I reflected on all the beautiful things that happened in my day...

Every evening when I get home, my cat and I have this mandatory cuddle ritual. He runs to meet me at the door, stands on his tippity-toes and wraps his paws around my leg to give me "hugs" (actual, legitimate hugs) and after I hang up my coat, hat, scarf, gloves and take off my shoes like some bohemian Mr. Rogers, we go and cuddle on the couch for fifteen minutes. Every day. Technically he was supposed to be MY therapy animal but I guess we alternate roles when needed.

So I walk inside, prepare for our usual greetings and as I approached the couch I saw a giant, oddly coloured and textured brown mass on the carpet. I thought maybe he'd gotten REALLY sick in a digestive way but even still, there's no way something that big could come out of a cat his size. I get closer and realize it's a giant piece of Kentucky fried CHICKEN!

I take another step closer and see ANOTHER piece of chicken and a a bucket tipped over. Guess who's mama forgot to put date-night leftovers back in the fridge? ... but there were only two pieces on the floor and I know there was more chicken there last night. As I turned around to ask him where he put the rest I noticed there's a TRAIL of CHICKEN leading to his food bowl.

He managed to pry open the bucket lid, pull out each piece and it looks like he was attempting to carry them all to his food bowl on the other side of the house.

I tried so hard to be mad but I was laughing too hard. In so many ways he reminds me of a toddler. He likes to play in the toilet, he leaves toys all over the house that I'm constantly tripping over and he always has to be right underfoot in everything I do from the moment I get home at night to the moment I leave for work the next day.

I have crunchy chicken debris all over my living room, study area and leading up to my kitchen and I couldn't feel more blessed or happy if I tried.